See? Epic

Sayonara 2010!

Wow I have really slacked on this blogging thing. Lots has changed, I have grown, Payton has grown, and it is about time for an update.

Lets start off with the most important.....Payton. This little spit-fire is headed to the terrible twos, and fast. I can't take my eyes off of her for 10 seconds or she has drawn on the furniture, climbed up to the tv, or dumped all her toys out on the floor and then ran them over with her power ATV. I was able to have her for Christmas this year, and what a little nut she was. She has the most exaggerated expressions I have ever seen. Her reaction to her gifts (and everyone elses) was priceless. She looks and acts just like me when I was a toddler, and I am loving all of the time I get to spend with her. She is turning two on January 28th, and be prepared for a party of epic proportions :)

Now on to the never-ending divorce. Seriously, I am pretty sure we are going for some kind of record here. We have settled on custody (joint legal custody, but I have the final say and sole physical custody) but are still not seeing eye-to-eye on a few other things, mainly the house. We recently went to court and Josh lost even more time with Payton because he thinks he writes the rules and that I am going to allow him to do that like I did for the years we were married. I wish we could just be divorced and have everything final so that I can move on as he says he has. One would think he would want this divorce over even more than I do, but that doesn't seem to be the case.

As far as my feelings towards them, I am honestly at a point where I can say I wish them the best. I went through the grieving process, the hatred, the name calling, the tears, and the pain. They clearly wanted so bad to be with each other, and now they can be without lying or cheating. Trust me, I did not feel like this a few months ago, but I am so much happier now and can finally be myself. While I certainly do not promote divorce, it was truly the best option for us. I am so much better off without him dragging me down, and I never would have been as happy as I am now. So really, I have to thank Josh and Christine, because I would have never considered divorce on my own. I was not strong enough. I have learned so much in the past year about myself that I would not have learned, and I will be a better wife to my next prince charming when that time comes.

Speaking of prince charming......I am having a fantastic time in the dating world. Quite a lot has changed since I was 16! Because I met Josh at 16, and wasted 2 years waiting for him while he was on a mission, I have missed out on a lot. While I would much rather just be a wife and a mother, this has been a whole new experience. My time is limited (see paragraph 3,) but I have met some great guys and have learned from each of them.

I have the most amazing friends. It's funny who you keep in touch with, even when your lives turn out nothing like you thought. I love my friends who I have known since potty-training, and those I have met, or re-met, this year. I have such a fun bunco group that I look forward to partying with every month, and it is so fun to see Payton playing with kiddos of my friends I knew at her age.

I am so excited for 2011. While the unknown scares me a little, I figure it can only get better from here right?

**UPDATE** spoke with my attorney today and the divorce was signed on the 27th so I am officially single!! BOO YA!

the dentist

My little munchkin took her first trip to the dentist the other day. She has a mouth full of teeth, and healthy teeth is a huge thing to me. We went to Little Peoples Dental and they were fantastic! Dr. Stewart was fantastic, and gave me really good tips. The whole staff was so cute with Payton. She got a new toothbrush, and now lets me brush her teeth much better than before!

Halloween!

This year Halloween had to be a little different since Josh had Payton. I made the most of it though, and was able to do some fun things with her. Besides the haunted train ride, Payton and I went to our ward Halloween party. They had a chili cook-off and lots of fun activities for kids. I have a new love for my ward, and I am really glad we went. Next Halloween is mine, and I am already thinking about our costumes and a party.

Haunted Canyon Train Ride

This weekend we headed up Provo Canyon and took the kiddos on the Heber Creeper Haunted Canyon train ride. It was a little silly, but perfect for the young kids. Payton kept saying "Choo Choo!" while we were waiting for the train. It was so cute. This is definitely something we will be doing again next year.

Utah State Fair

We visited the Utah State Fair today. Payton loved the pony rides the best. Ponies, sheep, goats, and frozen lemonade. A great way to end the summer.

look what I found

While mowing my lawn this summer I noticed fruit on the two trees in my backyard. I am pretty sure there was not fruit on them this large last year, but maybe I just don't remember. These pics are a few weeks old, and the apples are huge! Kinda fun.

Just a quick update on how we are doing, not like anybody reads this anymore though.

Payton is doing fantastic. She is talking so much and I love to hear what she comes up with next. She has her favorite bear that goes with her everywhere, has to try food before she does, and everybody has to give him a kiss before you can give her one. She is quite stubborn, but still has the sweetest personality. She amazes me more and more every day.

I am doing....well okay. Today has been a really bad week, and it is only Wednesday. I made the decision to take Sergeant to the Humane Society, and for those who know me well, this was not an easy decision. I am still crying about it and probably will for weeks, or months.

The divorce is moving along slowly, but hopefully we will be officially divorced in a few weeks. This hasn't come without weekly drama, for example today Josh and I spent 6+ hours arguing in text about a 3 hour visit. This is how my life will be until Payton is 18. Awesome.

The cakes are going really well. I would love to do more, but they seem to come in spurts. I love the practice and the expression on peoples face when they see them. I am so glad I put myself out there and decided to do this.

Well, that is just a little bit of what is going on with us. Any further explanation would not be something I could write out. I am really hoping for the day that I can write on here, "well, nothing much has happened lately"   I miss the boring days.......